When I work with a new client I often start by asking them HOW they plan on finding their path - what work have they done and how have they done it. Basically, I ask how they think they’ll finally figure it all out.
Some say they’ve read a few self-help books, maybe taken a personality test that told them they were a scrabble word jumble worth of letters (INFJIDGAF) or that they tried meditation but that nothing has really worked.
A few (yes more than one) has said something along the lines of :
“I'd probably go away to some retreat in Costa Rica or do a Eat Pray Love trip haha.” Hahaha…. Hahaha….. NO.
I really don’t get this "spend all your money on a destination trip is the only way to ‘find yourself’" trope. You don't have to (and really shouldn’t) travel to have an ‘experience’ that allows you to finally figure your stuff out. It’s a dangerous idea actually.
Why? Well you’re still taking that self on that trip with you right? Wherever you go there you, and your current beliefs, are.
Well then WTF are you supposed to do then? I mean, gobbling pasta in Italy and bonking hot strangers in Bali doesn’t sound terrible, but it ain’t going to help you find work that makes you happy. Not really. That’s all you and your mindset.
I’m a big believer in the idea that you can’t move forward until you you really acknowledge where you are right now. This can take some major balls of honesty which is hard for lots of us, because we are SUPER great at lying to ourselves.
Ok, I’m about to get reaauul coachy here. You need to address your Limiting Beliefs ASAP. ‘Cool’ you might be saying to yourself. Wait, what? What the hell are "limiting beliefs"?
Limiting beliefs are things you believe to be true about your situation/yourself/the world at large that limits your actions in some way. Oookkkaaayyy so how can you tackle this spiffy new problem you didn’t know you had? How do you identify your limiting beliefs?:
Step 1. Ask yourself “What are my limiting beliefs about my work?”
Step 2. Question your answers.
Step 3. Flip them and then rewrite them.
Belief: "I can’t do anything but the bartending I’ve been doing because I’m not trained in anything else."
Question: Why is not being trained in anything else yet so bad?
Flip: I’m totally open and available to choose new skills to learn!
Belief: "I can’t leave my banking job to wait tables because my college friends will look down on me."
Question: Does it matter what those guys miserable at their 9-5’s think?
Flip: A restaurant job will allow me the freedom to take that 2 month trip to Southeast Asia I’ve been dreaming about since college.
See how this works? Grab some time, a thing you like to write on or in, maybe an adult beverage and get to it!
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So, what are your limiting beliefs about your work life? How can those beliefs be flipped? How will you rewrite your beliefs? No really I'd love to know! Comment below or shoot me an email!